It's almost Christmas

This year has been a bit different for me for the holidays. I've not been running around buying gifts and shopping. Due to financial circumstances, money has been abnormally tight for the holidays. It's been nuts. I've racked up several thousand dollars in bills in the past two months making it impossible to afford Christmas, but then again, what is the real meaning behind Christmas and do we loose sight of that sometimes? It's been a frustrating time for me and like anything that boils for a long time, it all comes to blow. Last week was probably one of my tougher weeks, emotionally. I got yelled at by a co-worker, had a break-down in front of my boss and sort of butted heads with my mom. All in all it sounds pretty rough. In all honesty, it was a good experience. Yes, I got yelled at by a co-worker. I deserved it and I felt foolish for having to be put in my place. I was humbled. I realized how awful I really can be in my dark moments. That's when I fell apart in front of my boss. I had a really good heart to heart with him. I sat in a state of self-loathing. You can blame it all on built up stress, anxieties and just plain hormones. All in all through the runny nose, tears and hiccups, I was able to reconnect with my boss on the level of friendship that I thought I'd ruined long ago. I realized that I'm very fortunate to work in an environment where we really are very much like family. I was able to sit and listen openly to his criticism over my lousy attitude. I realized I had to pull out of my "funk" or I'd really loose a good thing. It's not easy to humble yourself and change some bad attitudes and views in life. I walked away determined to try to be a nicer person and be grateful to my co-workers for the strong characters that they are. Mom was just at the receiving end of a very rough week. She'd done what every mother would do, and that is try to swoop in and fix her suffering child's pain. She and I came to realize that not always is a fallen child asking to be picked up, but rather given encouragement to pick themselves up. I will not learn if someone else picks me up. I will become stronger if I pick myself up out of the hole of depression and financial stress. From talking to my brother, I was able to see that I needed to stand strong and could stand strong and overcome the trials life gave me without offending those around me. I want my parents to know that I love them dearly for their love and support. I now realize that parents really don't have all the answers and they shouldn't. Somethings we, as children, must learn on our own. It is a natural thing to want to save a child from suffering. It is true that a bird will not survive if you break away the shell for the chic. The process of breaking the shell makes them strong enough to face the outside world. I learned that communication and truly understanding is key to strong ties with loved ones. Do we hear the words our friends and family speak and not understand what they are saying because we are thinking too hard about our response back? We are all traveling through life together, perhaps we should start really working together. I could work a lot harder on such a practice. I've learned valuable lessons this holiday season and none of it has come with a clever marketing angle. I am so grateful for my religious faith. I know that there are many out there who are still searching for that religious foundation. It makes all the world of difference for me and I pray you find your own foundation in Christ. I firmly believe that the world would not still be so touched by this man if he were not real. What a wonderful season to reflect on our own beliefs in this savior. Merry Christmas all!